


Mechaphilia, Variations of

by ThePrincessOfPirates



Category: Space Quest (Video Games)
Genre: M/M, Mechaphilia, Public Humiliation, Public Masturbation, Public Sex, Roger is a slut, Sex on a Car, Sidney learns disgust, everything's fuckable if you give roger time
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-19
Updated: 2017-07-28
Packaged: 2018-11-15 21:18:38
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,339
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11239431
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ThePrincessOfPirates/pseuds/ThePrincessOfPirates
Summary: Engine's don't beat like hearts do.(Roger gets caught jerking off on the hood of a pod racer and is sentenced to public humiliation for it.)





	1. Car Boy

**Author's Note:**

> Enjoy, you degenerates.

“Roger Wilco, you have plead guilty the charges of public indecency, inappropriate use of ConFederation equipment and disorderly conduct on the clock. The tribunal has decided upon your punishment; public humiliation.” Commander Kielbasa flipped through the pages of the case.

This was not his first or last tribunal meeting today and it was already getting old. Though this one was unique. Roger had been in trouble a lot for common offenses though they never carried this far since they were usually little things like sleeping in, breaking dress code, napping on the clock and all the other things everyone else did at least once.

No, this was unique and the punishment was equally special. He was tempted to take time off just to spectate.

“Lieutenant Commander Sidney will oversee your punishment as he has been deemed important enough to you to make this more uncomfortable but not emotionally invested enough to go easy on you.” Kielbasa closed the file and passed it to the ensign next to him to put away. “You will wait in your quarters, under surveillance until the time ordered. You are dismissed.”

Joke was, no one told him what time that was so he was stuck with waiting around in his room just thinking about everything he'd done wrong over the past days.

One, he was letting it get too regular. It stopped being spur of the moment, late night escapades and it became an every-other-night ritual. In some way it was till spontaneous, he was just getting worse and worse at impulse control.

Two, he didn't lock the door. Though he'd sworn to the tribunal he thought he did, he hadn't. That was part of the fun, the trill of knowing he could get caught at any moment (though he never factored in that he would get caught) by a security guard or another janitor. Keeping the door unlocked was just one more cherry on top of it all.

Three, he couldn't just let neutral be enough. He got cocky shifted the pod up to drive and then first gear, and second, and third and then fourth even though there's no way that was good for the engine. And as much as he'd love to feel the purr of sixth or hyper-drive, he thought someone might hear at that volume. Too bad for him someone could hear at fourth already.

But still, public humiliation for something as simple as masturbating in the pod-bay to the thrum of a racing engine, that seemed cruel and unusual. Though Sidney had reminded him there was nothing usual about the infraction. It wasn't as if everyone was going around with that many kinks to satisfy and the means to do it. He had to clean rooms, so he was no stranger to what happened on the ship (he'd pretty much seen everything), but he found less condoms in the loading and docking bays than he assumed he would.

“Roger, I'm here to retrieve you.” The warm but robotic voice on the other side of the door was a welcome break from pondering the grosser aspects of his profession.

“So where are we headed? Am I gonna get the stocks?” Roger joked. “Or just emotionally and socially shamed in front of my peers?”

“You know I can't tell you that, Roger.” Sidney gave him a sympathetic look. “In fact I wasn't even supposed to talk to you. I'm only breaking that rule because I'm curious. What's your thing for mechanics. First me, not that I'm complaining, then the pod. It's an odd pattern of behavior that I haven't seen in any other humanoid or non-mechanical being.”

“It's the engine.” Roger answered. “And the rest of it too but the engine is what makes you like the racer. The soft hum during normal operation that can get up to a full bodied roar when you stress it enough. You can't imagine how nice it was to listen to your servos scream, and feel how that part of your body, where the magic happens, vibrated and warmed. Sidney, computers are better than people and not just because they don't judge.”

“I'm flattered.” The usual purr of Sidney's computers stuttered a little at the rather sexual nature of Roger's reply. He had assumed it was based off convenience or just something warm and obedient, not a whole big deal that made Roger somehow prefer machines over people. “Roger this is as far as I can take you without inhibiting your sight, it has to be a surprise where we're headed.”

The blindfold was soft and pretty comfortable but he still wanted to see where he was going. Holding on to Sidney was effective but made him feel helpless.

“We're almost there, Roger. I want you to cooperate with me, it'll make this quite a bit easier on you, I promise.” Sidney led him down the hallway and up to a doorway, punching in a code to open the door, urging Roger in first.

“Mr Wilco, would you please remove the blindfold, please.” They obviously had an audience if Sidney was switching to such formal terms so soon.

It was a docking bay, clean, simple, but on the small side though all of that information was second to what was inside.

The transportation pod was hardly transportation class, far too fast for anything that menial. She was a beauty, glossy blue paint job that glittered ever so slightly in the florescent lights. She was a recognizable model, but not a famous one, a '98 XM Caesar. New, relatively, but with a nice retro design that called back to a simpler, more beauty based time in engineering. A simple marker on the side indicated the engine type; not just a V10 but V12, a real rambunctious, rowdy piece of work that could go from zero to light speed in seconds. She was magnificent and he was having a little trouble keeping down his excitement.

This was some higher up's personal vehicle probably, or the one they used to pick up diplomats they wanted to make a good impression on. This was a peacock-ing racer if he'd ever seen one.

In the hazy, dream-like state of admiring the masterpiece in front of him, he almost missed the small meeting of people, naturally, including the captain himself, sitting on the observational deck. The glass kept him from hearing them but chances are, the intercom was on so they could hear him.

He didn't look to see if he knew any of them, he didn't want to think about that.

“Rog- Mr Wilco, have you guessed what we're here for?” Sidney stepped in after him, letting the door close and lock. No escaping now.

“A repeat performance?” Roger offered.

“I guess you could call it that.” Sidney took a deep breath, only for show though, the android had no need for air. “If you wouldn't mind sitting on the hood.”

“God, I don't want to...” Roger's stomach started to do somersaults at the thought of what was going to happen next.

“I believe I phrased that inappropriately. Mr Wilco, please go sit on the hood, that's an order.” Sidney stood firm and strict, only because he was told to.

“I'm going to throw up.” Roger sighed.

“Not on the vehicle. Should disgust overtake you, refrain from dirtying anything important.” Sidney followed him to the blue beauty that was starting to look more and more like his coffin.

He sat there, with his eyes on his boots, avoiding acknowledging his fellow crew mates who had all come to watch him defile himself in public. He was hoping at least a few of them would be ashamed enough to look away and give him a mocking semblance of decency.

“Mr Wilco, would you mind explaining to the spectators what you did to earn such a specific form of punishment.” It was grammatically phrased like a question but it wasn't said like one.

“I... um... I-” Roger choked.

“Look up, show them your face.” Sidney was trying to be kind but he had a guideline to follow.

Roger focused on Kielbasa the one face he wasn't surprised to see. A person he knew he'd already destroyed his own image in front of, knowing that there might be a few people among them who might have a sliver of respect left for him left.

“I touched myself inappropriately,” his throat tightened up, “while messing around with a transportation pod that I wasn't supposed to touch. I did all of this while I was supposed to be working.” Roger thought he might cry, but he choked back most of the tears.

“I assume the vast majority of you are aware of what is coming next but in case you're having second thoughts about sitting in or you only came here to see the first part, you may leave at any time. You may also re-enter at any time, though I can't give you any sort of time table for the affairs.” Sidney was treating it like a sideshow, entertainment of sorts. As disturbing as that thought was, Roger would be lying if he didn't say it did something for him in a twisted, masochistic way.

Sidney reached into the compact interior after opening the door and shifted on the parking break. Suddenly, everything became a little too real for Roger. This wasn't just a distant thought of what's to come, this was a current event of what was about to happen. It was dizzying to so suddenly realize his fate. The engine turned over smoothly, perfect, without a single hitch and the soft rumble beneath Roger started to warm. Then he shifted it one step up and the engine whined into it's new pace, humming harder and louder. Roger kept his knees together for as much as it was worth.

“It's in first gear, Mr Wilco.” There was an unspoken order in his words but Roger didn't flinch.

“Mr Wilco.” That same tone again. The blood rushing through Roger's ears was starting to get deafening.

“Roger Wilco, do I need to order you to proceed?” Still not a question but this time, a threat.

“I just need a second...” Roger mumbled.

“I can see from here that that's not true. You're perfectly ready.” Sidney paced closer. “I'll prove it for those who don't have quite the perspective I do.”

Despite the awkward angle, Sidney's superior strength let him push Roger's legs apart without getting in front of him and blocking anyone's view. This was one of two times in Roger's life (we won't speak of the first) where he was disappointed that he wasn't small. He was fairly average but average is still large enough to show through pants.

He tried to cover his face with his hands as if that would make it any better.

“Please refrain from that,” Sidney commanded. Roger obeyed and splayed his fingers out on the hood which didn't help his predicament. “Roger.” Sidney was trying to encourage him off the edge and it might work if not for the deep rooted fear in his gut. “I won't ask again.”

He hesitated for a moment, lifting his right hand off the hood only inches, hovering in between the two options but he just couldn't close the gap.

“And I thought you would want to get this over with.” Sidney put one hand on his chest to force him to lie down, the vibrations of the engine now running through his back and spine, and the other where Roger couldn't bring himself to go. “I will not do your duty for you, but I'm hoping I can at least provide some encouragement so I needn't wait for you to find the guts to do what needs to be done.”

Sidney was getting oddly mean with his comments but Roger didn't really notice. He was too busy trying to keep his mouth shut and not voice his enjoyment as much as he wanted to. The hands on him were firm and demanding, no room for disobedience but this a warmth and softness that was nearing human and this look in Sidney's eyes almost read as disappointment. God, if that wasn't the ticket; thinking of Sidney telling him how let down he was by Roger's behavior, how deviant and dirty he was, how Sidney had expected more from him.

He tried to muffle the moan that slipped from his lips but Sidney slapped his hand away.

“You may not do that.” He refocused his attention to Roger's hands, pulling his right down to where it was needed and keeping Roger's left out of use.

Roger fumbled with his belt buckle, struggling to undo it with only one hand.

“Now you understand.” Sidney stepped back to reach back into the car. Just as it popped into second, Roger got a decent hold on his cock and it was undeniably among the top 5 most erotic moments in his life, probably second only to his first escapade with Sidney and it was slowly creeping closer to the top.

He went to muffle another pitiful sound but Sidney grabbed his wrist before he could even start moving.

“Even children can learn from a warning, Wilco.” Sidney sounded angry, a tone Roger had never heard before and which caused him to involuntarily buck into his own hand.

“I'm sorry, sir.” Roger didn't think much of the reply, but Sidney almost had sparks coming off of him. He grabbed a handful of Roger's hair and yanked, making him yelp in surprise.

“And don't think of biting your tongue, either. I want it all, Wilco.” Even though in the back of his mind, Roger was incredibly embarrassed, most of his frontal lobe was screaming “OH, GOD, **YES!!!** ”

Sidney slipped away into the driver's seat, finally settling himself in. The engine popped up a gear and with the now prevalent shudder and the warmth coming off of it, Roger arched his back and found himself fighting back orgasm for just two or three more seconds of whatever ring of purgatory he'd died and gone to.

The hood stalled and shook again, now running at fourth and the sounds Roger was making were loud enough to be heard over the growl she made. Every second built upon the last and it was getting harder and harder keep from just going full bore. And why should he hold back, the pistons under his back certainly weren't.

When Sidney shifted again, Roger knew he couldn't hope to hold out much longer with how the machine was roaring. He tucked his head under his arm, covering his eyes, to try and focus for just another second longer. The sound of the Caesar filled his ears and he felt like he was going to drown in it as he felt his heart beat in his chest with as much power as the engine ran below him.

Then, Sidney pressed the gas. Just a little bit of an influx in volume and speed and Roger was gone. He could feel himself scream but all he could hear was his own heart beat and the engine as he stained his own shirt with streaks of cum.

Sidney must have heard his call because the pod carefully shifted back down to neutral and turned off.

“Hm.” Sidney made a quiet noise of disgust, but waited for Roger to come to his senses before he spoke. “Sit up, Wilco, acknowledge the commander and his compatriots.”

The pit of ice in Roger's stomach came back again at the reminder and this time he couldn't stop himself from crying as Sidney pulled him by his collar to face his audience.

“You put on a really wonderful show, but now it's time for you to clean up the mess you've made with your debauchery. Wax the racer, Wilco.” Sidney placed the bucket of supplies near Roger's feet and stood with his arms crossed, waiting. It wasn't until Roger had fixed his pants and started wiping the hood down that he noticed something.

Sidney had broken the first rule of theatrical performance: face the audience. A quick glance seemed to show the reason why. Despite all of his perfect composure and calmness, the android was uncomfortably hard under his clothes and, it was the sort of bulge that put fear in the hearts of strong men. The look Sidney gave him very clearly stated that he definitely didn't want to say anything or draw any attention to it.

The humor of it, that he had somehow managed to get an android all hot and bothered, didn't really fix how awful he felt, but it lightened the mood. He wasn't the only one having a tough day. The cold heaving in his chest continued but it lightened.

There wasn't much for him to fix except what he scuffed since he managed to keep the mess self contained on his own clothing but he took his time to make the hood even shinier and cleaner than when he came in.

“That's satisfactory, janitor. I don't want to give you any time in here you might enjoy.” Sidney pulled Roger to his feet with one hand and grabbed the supplies with another. “The guard out front will take you back to your quarters.”

And that's where Roger spent the rest of his afternoon, crying and tossing and turning in his bed trying to find some relief from the disgust welling up in his guts.


	2. Robot Fucker

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sidney's circuits short-circuit Circuit Sidney's circuitous way of handling arousal.  
> (Translation; the man played himself, mechanically speaking.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Probably more comedy than anyone expected but that is my dream job so chuckle on, hopefully.

The intercom was hard to miss even when there was music playing but in the painful silence of his misery it pierced his hazy consciousness.

“Janitor, second class, Roger Wilco. I'm confined to quarters right now so if you need something cleaned up, call Chip.” Roger mumbled. It was the fourth time someone had tried to call on him this evening. Apparently something had riled up the crew to start plastering obscenities like “robo slut” and “pod fucker” on the walls. Odd thing was, it was appearing in departments that didn't give time off for their crew members to spectate. Roger didn't want to know how quickly word had spread or how detailed the accounts had been.

“Actually Roger, we just rerouted all your work related calls to Chip so you won't be bothered anymore.” Sidney smiled at him through the tiny comm screen.

“Oh, thank you.” As much as Roger hated the play by play updates of the botany department's choice words on the matter, things would be a little empty without at least a few interruptions.

“Roger, may I ask a personal favor of you?” Sidney looked nervous.

“Depends what it is but probably yes. Y'know, within reason.” Roger shrugged.

“Would you mind if I came to visit?” Sidney's eyes darted around him to see if anyone was listening. “I do mean so in a way that is sexual in nature, if it isn't too disruptive. I don't want to be a burden but-”

“I didn't know your programming let you initiate sex, this isn't like you. Gosh, what did you do with the real Sidney? Is he still in there? Where's the helpless, flustered, virgin robot I know and love?” Roger chuckled. “But seriously, I need a break from wallowing in my own self-pity.”

“Roger, I'm perfectly equipped for a wide range of emotions. Sadly, lust is one of the newer ones. As distasteful as I find it, there's not a lot I can do. Get cleaned up, my shift ends in a half-hour.” Sidney relaxed a little. His synthetic emotions were almost getting too realistic if he was starting to become physically needy.

The comm line went cold before Roger could say anything else.

“Thanks for your cooperation, Roger!” He mimicked his friend's voice the best he could. “You're a real pal to help me out with this uncontrollable android dong of mine and it's badly timed raging hard-ons.” Roger sighed. “Will I ever get any thanks for my work?”

Thirty minutes and one hot shower later, Roger found himself waiting around for something to happen, just like before. Slumping in his seat he found that even video games couldn't keep him from getting antsy. Plus, Toe-jam and Earl is a little difficult to play one-player.

The bell on the door brought Roger out of his concentration.

“I'm coming.” Roger fumbled with the door latch but Sidney pushed his way in before it could open all the way, shutting and locking it behind himself.

“You make me sick,” Sidney picked up Roger by the lapels and slammed him against the door. The force of it made Roger's teeth click.

“Hey, whoa... Sidney? What's gotten into you?” Roger had had nightmares like this before, that Sidney tried to kill him in a fit of mechanical overload.

“You and a few lines of faulty coding.” Sidney's grip was ironclad and his eyes burned with... something... a mixture of anger, desire, and disgust. “That revolting display you put on today. Sure, I would have brushed it off normally but I couldn't stop thinking about how... How good if felt to be better than you. You'll never have that feeling, you low-grade, under-paid, staffer but it feels great. You're beneath me and I can do pretty much anything I want to you. Lieutenant Commanders don't get questioned about how they treat the help. I could beat you senseless, fuck you silly, and just leave you and I wouldn't even get a slap on the wrist. But you'd like that wouldn't you? You're a slut.”

Sidney bit hard into the juncture between Roger's neck and his shoulder, making him hiss.

“Sidney, what are you doing?” Roger tugged, jerked and wriggled but to no avail, the grip on his biceps pinning him to the door was far too strong to be budged.

“Why do you call me that like we're equals? You're no one compared to me, Roger. You ought to address me with respect. Who taught you to talk back to your superiors like that? It's a shame the captain couldn't beat that disrespect out of you. Call me sir or address me by my rank as you should, whore.” Sidney growled and pressed Wilco against the metal door even harder.

“Sid- Sir, I-” Roger struggled to find anything to say, the cocktail of fear, pain and arousal pooling in his gut rather distractingly.

“Are you enjoying this, Wilco?” Sidney mused, getting his thigh between Rogers'. “I'll teach you your place as a subservient slut for your higher-ups. Maybe then you'll be more than a worthless, brainless, spineless, and debauched excuse of a janitor.”

“Please,” Roger whined no longer caring that Sidney might be inches from a circuitry melt-down that could end in his death.

“You're beyond desperate but at least you understand. You're absolutely repugnant, do you know that, Wilco?” He glares at Roger with a piercing gaze of malice and annoyance. “Sure, you're cute and all but you're dirty, Roger. A transportation vehicle? Did you just run out of crew members to whore yourself out to? Or will you really do anything to just get the warm feeling of something alive or living-adjacent up against you? You're a real slut, Roger.”

“Yes, sir,” something in Roger's guts started doing somersaults. “I'll do anything you want.”

“Perfect.” Sidney's systems were running so hot that the kisses he left on Roger's neck felt feverish in comparison to the cold air. “I might go gentle on you if you keep that obedience up... or go harder if that's what you like. What do you want, Roger?”

“Whatever you want, Commander.” Roger kissed Sidney's cheek, the feeling of the shiny synthetic skin under his lips warm but inhuman.

“You're easy to break. So weak willed and imperfect. I could shatter your bones in my hands but that would be too easy.” Sidney tightens his grip to bruising point. “I think I'd rather find your sweet spots and shatter you from the inside out. Did anyone tell you the big mess you've been stirring up in your downtime.”

“What?” The slightest shred of clarity slipped through the thick haze of lust to form a separate haze of confusion.

“Somebody from medical got a little cocky... Slipped a camera in. Everyone with a few minutes on their hands has seen that video.” Sidney's smile was almost too human for his face, confident and overzealous in a way Roger hadn't seen. “Mr Wilco, this affair will never blow over for you.”

A jostling shove forced him face first into the rumpled sheets on his bed, Sidney's boot heals pacing towards his now prone victim. He made a move to turn himself over but a strong hand pressed him back down.

“Stay where I put you.” Two hands pressed down on his shoulders as more weight shifted onto the mattress. With his head turned to the side Roger could only get a glimpse of Sidney's face but he looked like he was plotting something.

“My safety protocols are still in place if you're wondering. I won't hurt you... at least not seriously.” Sidney worked his finger's under the hem of Roger's shirt, pushing it up inch by inch, eventually tossing it to the side but not after much pomp and circumstance.

Roger reached behind himself, grasping for shirt fabric only to have Sidney grab his elbows and pull them flat against his sides.

“No touching?” Roger's voice sounded like a whine.

“Not just yet.” Sidney leaned down closer and started trailing kisses on the back of Roger's neck whispering nearly unintelligible curses of “you enticing temptress” and “dirties whore this side of Orion's belt.”

Sidney suddenly grabbed a handful of Roger's hair, freeing up one of his arms not that he tried anything. He didn't maneuver anything around just tugged the locks as if to prove he could. Something about his seduction process felt heated and improvised, real in comparison to the per-programmed tumbles that Roger had felt before. It made it easy to forget his partner wasn't human. If not for the thrum of the processors that rested against his spine, Roger might have thought his robot had been replaced with an organic copy-cat. But there was no heartbeat under his ribs or pumping lungs to accompany the panting, just the computerized whirring of cooling fans running full blast.

“Better than the real thing...” Roger sighed into the pillow, even Sidney's hearing not picking up on it. Even this simple foreplay was driving him nuts.

“Roger,” Sidney threw Roger's belt to the side just as soon as he had it unbuckled and started in on the buttons next. “Did you follow my instructions? From earlier.”

“Yes, yes, absolutely, I'm ready. Please sir, fuck me.” He only said sir to rile Sidney up, press his buttons to urge him on.

“Since you asked so nicely.” There's a crinkling noise, a condom wrapper if Roger knows Sidney well, before a pressure so perfectly satisfying starts to fill every thought in his mind.

“Who trained you so well? You moan more than almost anyone on this ship and from so little. Someone must have taught you to be such a perfect slut. No wonder you weren't suited to being a captain. You're a captain's whore by nature. A career bitch.” The pressure increased to a firm stretch but he's still not near halfway in.

“Are you...” Roger interrupted himself with a porn star worthy whine. “Did you get bigger?”

“You don't sound disappointed. I think I recall you saying I was almost too big last time.” Sidney thrust just a little, the twitch of his hips more than enough to encourage Roger to buck back.

“I think I like the way that too big feels. It hurts really good.” Roger twisted his fingers further into his sheets. “Please, no more teasing Sidney. You know what I want.”

“Ask again. Say it right and I might consider.” Sidney dug his fingers into the soft flesh around Roger's narrow hips painfully.

“Please, sir, just fuck me. It's all I need.”

“And I would swear it's all you're good for.” Sidney settled himself for a moment. “Such a pretty boy, Roger. So perfectly dirty and corrupted yet somehow pure and sweet. You're exactly the way a whore should be.”

If Roger didn't know better he'd assume he'd shattered upon impact with the way every single muscle in his body trembled and shook. Something about the dirty talk immediately followed by the sudden and hard ride threw him for a loop he was having trouble holding on for.

“Thank you,” Roger's voice sounded shaky but contented with each wave of sugar sweet pleasure. His skin was so alight with excitement that even Sidney's hands on his waist sent shivers up his spine. Roger's whole body resonated, his heart beating in his chest like it could break through his ribcage.

“Don't come early.” Sidney could tell he was steadily reaching towards the peak. Roger seemed to snap out of his haze, the completely blissed out look on his face disappearing in an instant.

“I promise I won't.” Roger's gut was starting to tighten but it wasn't enough to be imminent just yet. However, by his best estimate, this wasn't going to last all night either.

“Don't make promises you can't keep, Rog.” Sidney's movements became more erratic yet somehow still perfectly timed and gauged.

“Oh screw you...” Roger sighed, a tremor running through his body to accompany it.

“I'm merely holding you to your word. There's no need to use that sort of harsh language with me, slut.” Despite Sidney's inexperience with comedy, he was getting better with practice.

“There's a time and a place, Sidney.” Roger chuckled, still shaking from Sidney's un-stalled movement.

“So mid-coitus is not ideal for a joke? But I was told laughter could make sex all that much better.” Sidney almost sounded perplexed. Though, still, his body moved without him.

“Normal sex, sure throw some comedy in. This is different though. I'll explain the social intricacies later. Get back on task, Sidney.” Roger huffed. He was bad at talking social-psychology when he wasn't getting reamed.

“If you insist.” Sidney took a fistful of Roger's hair and pulled hard, forcing his back into an uncomfortable arch.

Roger groaned in pain but didn't make any move to escape the grip.

“Harder...” he whined. “Please, more. Just a li-” Sidney's hand, the free one, clasped around Roger's throat turning all of his protests into soft wheezing.

“Shhh... Don't make demands, just let me take care of it.”

He doesn't lose any time, in the next few moments, but it takes a bit for the ringing in his ears to quiet down enough for him to hear anything.

“I wasn't even supposed to come and visit you.” Sidney is already as clean and presentable as ever, smoothing out the wrinkles in his cloth.

“Hm?” Roger doesn't bother opening his eyes.

“You weren't supposed to get visitors. Being here is a direct violation of orders.” Sidney almost looks embarrassed. “I've really got to talk to that engineer. I understand wanting to humanize me but doesn't this seem like too much?”

“No, I love it. It's a great improvement.” Roger rolled over onto his back, stretching out.

“Roger, you're not being objective.” Sidney shook his head. “As an android, I should be above all the desires that plague organic life forms.”

“I say you suffer with us to better understand our pain. What you need is a full blown fetish.” Roger nodded to himself. “Yes, that would help your diplomacy skills greatly.”

“As your friend, I'm going to be honest with you; your sarcasm is going to end most of your relationships someday.” Sidney made his way for the door.

“You're probably right.” Roger rolled himself into a cocoon of sheets.

“Good night, Roger.” Sidney flipped the light switch on his way out.

“Fuck dude...” Roger mumbled to himself. “Goddamned bullshit motherfucking sort of day, man.”

“This used to be a children's game...” The Man Behind the Curtain sighed. “This used to be PG.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for handling all of that... I'm not sure. I hope you liked it. Hey, tell me if you did, I put a lot of time, love, and effort into this.

**Author's Note:**

> There's a chapter two in the works right now and I'll hopefully get it out ASAP so look out for that grand finale.


End file.
